Contests Schmontests

quill-and-ink-thumb10378560So I’ve decided to enter the world of contests. Writing contests, of course. Although I’ve always wanted to enter one of those flair bartending contests, but with my lack of depth perception the chance of beaning one of the judges is pretty good. A lawsuit even better.

Last month I entered my first ever REAL contest. Not that there are fake ones out there..the silicone boobies of the writing world…but some are just judged by normal people….your peers if you will. Friends even. And they’re FREE.

Not this hummer. This baby cost me $50 total. I entered both of my stories. Talk about a glutton for punishment. Even the lady who took my submissions said I really had a pair. (if you don’t know what that means, email me ok? we’ll talk) The contest was called love and laughter. Hellooooo!! Can we say heaven sent? That’s me! Laughter! How on earth could I not enter this contest? So I girded my loins (I’ve always liked that saying, almost as much as hoist by his own petard) gathered my $50 – hey, I’m a waitress, do you know how many $1 tips it takes to make fifty bucks? It takes….well…now that was a silly question.


Back to contest land. Immediately after sending off my carefully prepared, spell checked, beloved chapters, I discovered a spelling mistake. Ack!! You can’t retrieve email. Once it’s gone, baby, that sucker’s gone. Ah well. Luckily I am by nature a calm and mature, reasonable adult human being, and with a few long island ice teas and a package of oreos I was soon able to forget about my blunder.

At least until January 31, 2010 when they announce the winners. Ok, go back and read that line again. TWO THOUSAND AND TEN. That’s like ages! I’ll have to have my hair colored at least three times between now and then!

So, I decided to enter another contest. Yeah, you see the theme that’s happening here. This one is due next week, and the winner finds out at the end of November. TWO THOUSAND AND NINE. Whew. Only one hair coloring there.

It’s time I tossed my entries out there to the wolves, time to find out if where I’m going is where I should be. I’d have to say, that by most responses I get back from friends and family, I am.

Responses from professional agents and writers? Well, as my mama always says, if you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.


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